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2009 New Year Resolution
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Been neglecting this blog for way too long, since is the end of the year and awaiting to go out for countdown, let's blog...
Emo post ahead - Please click the x button if you are here for entertainment... (okay unless u r a sadist where seeing an emo freak provide some entertainment to u...)
2008
2 main milestone for me.. Getting my degree and passing my driving license
Other than that, nothing to rave about.. Life pretty monotonous on a personal level, my job sucks big time (but glad is going to be over soon) and my r/s?
"I'm not upset that you lied to me, i'm upset that from now on i can't believe you"
isn't it irony? Trust seems so 'easy' in the past? Never had a problem with that..
"I trust you" , can i say that again? I don't know, i wish i could.... it takes years to build up our trust, it takes seconds just to destroy it..
I dont like the feeling, is give me a sense of 'deja vu'. People close to me know how hurt i am when my last r/s end...
Whatever happen in the future, i will never regret my decision to company her to *** . even at the cost of our r/s. When it comes to r/s, i'm a selfless freak. If it means she can lead a better life, be happier i will leave... "Crap" i heard you say.. but i rather be alone, die a virgin (k i'm not ha) than to 'tie' down someone...
Cant deny, the thingy affect me a lot. A LOT. I wish i can have the M.I.B gadget where i can erase my memory, pretend nothing happen. Till someone invent that gadget, it will take some time for me to forget.. how long? i don't know, you can't put a deadline in matter of the heart.
But all this episode shows one thing, i am deeply in love with her... I could have end everything and walk away. I can't. How could i? Could you leave someone you love deeply behind? Someone that is part of your future planning? Someone you miss so much that when night falls, you feel an enduring pain in your heart? Before i met her, was never a fan of love.. i know the pain, the hurt that comes with it.. but the joy,laughter, the smile she put on my face makes it all worth while....
You seems so nonchalant about it, i know you are not.. i choose to believe you are as hurt and as guilty as you sound....
maybe i think too much..
2009
A) To enrol in CFA
b) Get my dream job
c) Renovate my dumb ass room
d) More disciplined
e) Bring her to Europe
Everything start from zero when the clock hit 12 tonight, and i mean everything...
Earn my trust dear, and i'll be yours and much more...
Let's start afresh.. *smile* who am i trying to kid here...
HAPPY NEW YEAR ...
AND YES I WILL BLOG MORE ...
I'll sing it
One last time for you
Then we really have to go
You've been the only thing
That's right
In all I've done
And I can barely look at you
But every single time I do
I know we'll make it anywhere
Away from here
Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear
Louder louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you
Can't raise your voice to say
To think
I might not see those eyes
Makes it so hard not to cry
And as we say
Our long goodbye
I nearly do
Light up
Slower slower
We don't have time for that
All I want is
To find an easier way
To get out
Of our little heads
Have heart my dear
We're bound to be afraid
Even if
It's just for a few days
Making up for all this mess
January 1, 2009 11:37 PM
hey, no idea why you banned me from your shoutbox since ive only tagged once, but anyway.. you finally updated!dont think too much, ive been through the same thing before, do cheer up, 1 day she will realise that you truly love her(: happy new year!
January 2, 2009 4:10 PM
i never banned la!! my tagboard crazy one ... i myself was being banned :) tks for the tag